eloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and
be in health , just as your soul prospers. - 3 John 1:2
be in health , just as your soul prospers. - 3 John 1:2
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
B
Love Relationships are gifts or at least they should be. Relationships should
enhance, uplift, and bring out the best in you, not the beast in you. Any
relationship you have should add to your life not take away from it. Sometimes
people settle for a messy relationship, because they don’t want to be alone.
However, we all know its better to be alone and at peace, rather than in a
relationship that is stressful and ugly.
People need to understand what a real relationship is and what it isn’t. I want
people to understand God’s original plan for the family. God is perfect in all that
He does. Sin has tainted the sacred institution marriage. Infatuation has tried to
disguise itself as true intimacy. Lust has made a mockery of love.
Real true, and pure love is not something that comes easy, but it is worth the work
you will have to put into it. I am hurt by the sad stories I hear from men and
women about the state of their relationships. People are truly settling for less than
God’s best. When you settle, it will take its toll on your heart, mind, body, soul and
spirit.
Let’s first explore a few things that a real love relationship is NOT:
enhance, uplift, and bring out the best in you, not the beast in you. Any
relationship you have should add to your life not take away from it. Sometimes
people settle for a messy relationship, because they don’t want to be alone.
However, we all know its better to be alone and at peace, rather than in a
relationship that is stressful and ugly.
People need to understand what a real relationship is and what it isn’t. I want
people to understand God’s original plan for the family. God is perfect in all that
He does. Sin has tainted the sacred institution marriage. Infatuation has tried to
disguise itself as true intimacy. Lust has made a mockery of love.
Real true, and pure love is not something that comes easy, but it is worth the work
you will have to put into it. I am hurt by the sad stories I hear from men and
women about the state of their relationships. People are truly settling for less than
God’s best. When you settle, it will take its toll on your heart, mind, body, soul and
spirit.
Let’s first explore a few things that a real love relationship is NOT:
 | Game playing and manipulation (it gets you nowhere, if a person wants | |
| you, they will act accordingly and love you for WHO you are, period. Also take note, those that have played games, are most likely NOT with the person they played the game on, its wasted energy.) |
| Being confused and wondering IF a person loves you, if they love you, | |
| you will know it, there should be no questions and you will not have to 'wonder') |
| Putting that person so far above you, that you don’t know WHO you are |
| Being unable to reach a person for long periods of time, (there are too | |
| many modes of communication today. When a person loves you, they want to be reached) |
| Making excuses for the person when you KNOW they are mistreating | |
| you |
| Controlling (or being controlled by) a person which may include | |
| alienating them from those that love them |
| Giving up your friendships and other relationships for the person |
| Insecurity and competitiveness amongst each other (we should | |
| complement not compete) |
| Women using men for money and trinkets as a trade for sex (Your body | |
| is worth much more than a Louis Vuitton, Lexus, condo or cash) |
| Men using women for nothing more than to satisfy their lust (To my | |
| church brethren, stop sleeping with women & then blaming them, GOD holds you responsible too!) |
| Treating each other like sex objects and nothing more |
| Dating people simply for 'what you can get', real love is about what you | |
| have to GIVE |
| Being ‘confused’ about whether or not you want to be with a person | |
| exclusively, either you do or you don’t. (Please don’t fool yourself, nobody is THAT confused. Grown folks know who they want and in what capacity.) |
| Being a surrogate boyfriend/girlfriend. For more on this click here |
| Always fighting, fussing and cussing. (come on now) |
| Abusing a person whether mental or physical and/or destroying | |
| personal property |
| Over-the-top possessiveness. A little jealously is healthy, but a person is | |
| not your slave to keep trapped all to yourself. People are individuals and need room to be their OWN person. |
| Being fearful in any capacity (the bible says there is NO fear in love) |
| Stalking and watching a person’s every move and invading their | |
| privacy (chances are if you have to do this, something is wrong and you need jump ship anyway) |
| Dating multiple people AND LYING about it |
| Just plain lying (about everything and nothing). You are grown, just tell | |
| the truth! |
| So called 'loving' someone but still dipping with others (you know what I | |
| mean) |
| Dating someone simply because they look 'good' on your arm (Looks will | |
| fade eventually and bad behavior can make the most beautiful person ugly.) |
| Doing everything for a person who is not reciprocating your efforts |
| Having children with multiple people and not taking care of them (they | |
| won’t take care of your’s either, trust) |
| Dating someone’s husband or wife (separated is STILL married. Don't be | |
| shocked when they go back to that 'awful' husband or wife!) |
| Breaking up with someone and immediately getting with someone else | |
| (get your mind/heart right first before you carry your baggage into another’s person’s life) |
| Getting married just because you want a wedding and all the | |
| ‘trappings’ without being as prepared for the ministry and work of a marriage. Marriage is more than candlelight, romance, & roses all the time, trust! |
| Being married and yet having a side affair because its ‘cheaper’ to keep | |
| them |
| Getting married, then divorced simply because you are not 'in love’ | |
| anymore. Love is an action word, you can make love work, if you try! |
| Men turning to men & women turning to women in a capacity that is | |
| more than friendship. God's plan is for a man and woman to relate romantically & thats about it. |
Copyright T Gordon 2007. Whole Souls Organization All rights reserved. Do not copy, distribute or use any part of this work without express, written permission from the creator of Whole Souls, T Gordon. |
Take a long hard look at this list, and then look at it again. If you find yourself the victim or the portrayer in
ANY of these scenarios, then I suggest you reevaluate your current relationships. One thing I can tell you for
sure; if any of this applies to you, it is NOT God’s plan for you. Real relationship is real work. Nobody is
perfect, but you are well aware of what is right and wrong, period.
Mistakes happen, we have all been there! But, if you are repeating the same pattern of foolishness with
partner after partner, chances are it's YOU. We all need help. We all need guidance. We all want healthy,
happy and whole relationships, but it begins with GOD and yourself first. Find out who you are, what you
like, what you can and cannot tolerate. Stick to your own rules, don’t let anyone break you from what you
know to be true and right!
God's heart is grieved because of the foolishness and mess of the relationships we allow ourselves to be in. It’s
time for us to get this thing right. Our families and children are suffering because of bad relationship choices.
He wants us to be healthy and whole individuals first. If you want to be single, then by all means be single.
But, don't make being single an excuse for wrong behavior that could possibly hurt those who care for you.
We have a responsibility to protect one another's hearts and that includes being honest, and acting
accordingly. Treat people how you would want to be treated.
A healthy relationship can make a person blossom, grow, flourish and be happy. If you are in a healthy
relationship GOOD, stay there! A bad relationship can make a person act out of character, be depressed,
angry, bitter and even suicidal! Also, if you are NOT married, please don't allow yourself to get real deep and
spiritual about love relationships. If a person tells you they just want to be friends, believe them. You cannot
'pray' a person into loving you. Love has to be evident amongst both partners. A person should want to be
with you as much as you want to be with them and vice versa. You cannot have a successful relationship
with only one person in love, this will only lead to heartbreak. When you see this happening, step back and
evaluate your situation. Don't stay yoked to someone that does not share the feelings you have. God gives us
free will to love who we choose, are you making the right choices?
Ask God for wisdom, knowledge and understanding in the area of your relationships, and follow His
guidance. Be patient, willing and obedient. God our Father, will lead you into healthy, happy, life-long, love
relationships with the RIGHT mate if you just let Him.
Remember, DO NOT SETTLE!!
Now its time to explore what real love relationships are. What Love Is!
ANY of these scenarios, then I suggest you reevaluate your current relationships. One thing I can tell you for
sure; if any of this applies to you, it is NOT God’s plan for you. Real relationship is real work. Nobody is
perfect, but you are well aware of what is right and wrong, period.
Mistakes happen, we have all been there! But, if you are repeating the same pattern of foolishness with
partner after partner, chances are it's YOU. We all need help. We all need guidance. We all want healthy,
happy and whole relationships, but it begins with GOD and yourself first. Find out who you are, what you
like, what you can and cannot tolerate. Stick to your own rules, don’t let anyone break you from what you
know to be true and right!
God's heart is grieved because of the foolishness and mess of the relationships we allow ourselves to be in. It’s
time for us to get this thing right. Our families and children are suffering because of bad relationship choices.
He wants us to be healthy and whole individuals first. If you want to be single, then by all means be single.
But, don't make being single an excuse for wrong behavior that could possibly hurt those who care for you.
We have a responsibility to protect one another's hearts and that includes being honest, and acting
accordingly. Treat people how you would want to be treated.
A healthy relationship can make a person blossom, grow, flourish and be happy. If you are in a healthy
relationship GOOD, stay there! A bad relationship can make a person act out of character, be depressed,
angry, bitter and even suicidal! Also, if you are NOT married, please don't allow yourself to get real deep and
spiritual about love relationships. If a person tells you they just want to be friends, believe them. You cannot
'pray' a person into loving you. Love has to be evident amongst both partners. A person should want to be
with you as much as you want to be with them and vice versa. You cannot have a successful relationship
with only one person in love, this will only lead to heartbreak. When you see this happening, step back and
evaluate your situation. Don't stay yoked to someone that does not share the feelings you have. God gives us
free will to love who we choose, are you making the right choices?
Ask God for wisdom, knowledge and understanding in the area of your relationships, and follow His
guidance. Be patient, willing and obedient. God our Father, will lead you into healthy, happy, life-long, love
relationships with the RIGHT mate if you just let Him.
Remember, DO NOT SETTLE!!
Now its time to explore what real love relationships are. What Love Is!
| Real Love Relationships What they ARE NOT! |
| ***Very Important Section!!*** I was awakened out of my sleep with this, that usually means GOD has something important to say! He wants His sons and daughters to know their value and worth. He wants us to get our relationships in order! Read on... |
